Felix was caught off guard by the question. Most people tiptoed around his crimes, obvious and otherwise, because it was what they’d been brought up to do. People from the Districts kept their mouths shut and people from the Capitol hardly saw anything in such stark terms as murder. Felix didn’t know how to respond for a long minute, furrowing his brow in confusion, wondering if he’d misheard her. The girl didn’t balk or backtrack and she didn’t try to clarify. No one could make him feel bad for the things he’d done, and he found himself thinking over the names and faces from the Arena.
“In general terms?” he repeated, his lips quirking up into a smirk. “Enough.” Perhaps she was simply curious, being a tribute, and he decided to elaborate. He gave her a critical look, weighing her up against his own tributes, past and present.
“You’ll figure it out in the Arena, but killing isn’t quite so hard as you might think. Emotionally, it’s more like putting your dog to sleep rather than seeing it suffer.” Most of his competition he’d decimated quickly and quietly. Putting on a show for the cameras was beneath him, though he liked the way blood pulsed from open wounds when he attacked with a blade. It wasn’t necessarily fun, but it wasn’t horrible either. He didn’t wake ten times in the night from nightmares the way other victors did. His conscience was calm and carefree, aware that had he not snapped necks or driven his knife into eye sockets the tributes he’d killed might have suffered in death rather than disappearing from the world with a soft grunt or whisper.
Felix blinked as he withdrew from his thoughts and focused on the girl again. “Why do you ask?” he questioned, a suspicious edge to his voice, which he lightened with a droll smile. “You’re not trying to get me into trouble, are you?”
The more Miranda thought about her own question, the more curious she became. The immorality of killing was disgusting to her and not something she thought she’d ever be able to stand. She had always tried to live a good and decent life in order to look like a good person to her child, or well her nephew and the Games were going to completely destroy that. She didn’t want to kill anyone, no matter how critical the situation. She wasn’t scared but she’d rather die a hero than live long enough to see herself become a villain. Felix had obviously chosen the latter. Fucking careers.
“So you don’t think about it at all?” Miranda had always had a strong conscious and she didn’t imagine that going away if she murdered someone, no matter what the circumstances were. “You don’t think about the families that lost a loved one? The potential good the person you killed could have done? Or how it’s now also partially your fault that those people will never see the light of day ever again?” She spoke nonchalantly about it, as if it wasn’t as important to her as it really was. She didn’t completely blame Felix for responding the way he had in the Arena, but instead blamed the Capitol for the most part. “Or how you’ve done nothing to stop it for future tributes?” If she survived this, which she really hoped she did, she would do everything in her power to bring down Snow and the Capitol. If there wasn’t some secret Resistance already, she would start her own and would burn the Capitol down.
“Curiosity killed the cat.” She said with a shrug of her shoulders. She was no longer hungry, her appetite ruined with the prospect of murder. His smile bothered her; the ability to smile so genuinely after speaking about the people you’d killed was repulsive. “As if I could get a mentor like you in trouble.” She added, as sarcastically as she possibly could.
“In the end we will both have to turn on each other though, all allies do. Doesn’t matter the District.”
That wasn’t information Robin didn’t know before. He knew perfectly well how the tributes broke their alliances all the time in the Arena, he had done it himself and he had seen a few of his tributes killing the other over the last years. Even if he himself hadn’t killed the girl from District 10, the thought of tributes training under his eyes killing each other wasn’t at all pleasing him. If he could decide this, he would wish for Miranda and Sebastian not to kill each other. It wasn’t a nice sight and it would probably lead to losing all their sponsors. If they would have sponsors by then, it was always hard to get some coming from the poorer Districts. “I know how that works”, he said in a flat voice. “Only one victor and so on. But until then it could save you some of the sponsors. Have you made other alliances? Except Sebastian?”
“Not yet. I’m sure we can come up with something though. Unless you had something in mind?”
Robin had to admit, he hadn’t. He liked to focus on training with every possible weapon, everything that could be important once it came down to live or die in the Arena. It was hard to find a real strategy since they never knew what the Arena would look like and what other alliances would wait for the tributes, how good the Careers were this time. He noticed as well that Miranda didn’t sound as if she wanted his help anyway and rather wanted to think about it with Sebastian on her own. “I didn’t come up with a strategy until now since I didn’t know your strengths or alliances, so no. You’re both old enough to make wise decisions on your own anyway, but I’m here if you’d like to discuss a strategy you come up with”, he explained.
Miranda didn’t much enjoy mulling over the thought of killing Sebastian, but if it came down to it, she didn’t doubt that she would be the Victor, at least in a fair fight. Sebastian still gave her the creeps so it was almost a nonissue to her, besides the fear of losing sponsors because of it. Nor did she expect Robin would like her much if she killed her District partner. She made a mental note to try a little harder to find Sunny and perhaps get the mentor on her side. “Nope, it’s just been Sebastian.” Besides one career mentor, Miranda hadn’t talked to anyone outside of her own District and she had no intention of changing that. She only wanted to be surrounded by things that reminded her of home and not meeting people that she would later have to kill. “The less allies, the less people I have to stab in the back.” Everyone was expecting everyone to try and kill them, or at least that was the smart thing to do, and the less people who expected better than that, the better.
“Exactly at what age does one become old enough to make a strategy that will either get them killed or save their life? Because I don’t think I’ve reached that life stage yet.” She said, her anger now passing being just mad at Robbie for no apparent reason to being mad at the Capitol for every reason possible. The Games were so beyond wrong and all Miranda wanted to do was make it stop and give the people she loved, and even the people she didn’t know who would be reaped in the future, a way out. “I have a general idea on how to take someone’s life but it’d be nice to get some pointers on how not to go insane and wind up some crazy cannibal.” She was tense and her nerves were on edge and the poor she thought about the Games, the angry she got. More than anything she just wanted to get rid of her anger with some physical violence.
I can’t get rid of you
I don’t know what to do
I don’t even know who is growing on who
‘Cos everywhere I go you’re there
Can’t get you out of my hair
Can’t pretend that I don’t care - it’s not fairI’m being punished for all my offences
I wanna touch you but I’m afraid of the consequences
I wanna banish you from which you came
But you’re part of me now
And I’ve only got myself to blameYou’re really growing on me
Or am I growing on you?
You’re really growing on me
Or am I growing on you?
Any fool can seeSleeping in an empty bed
Can’t get you off my head
I won’t have a life until you’re dead
Yes, you heard what I saidI wanna shake you off but you just won’t go
And you’re all over me but I don’t want anyone to know
That you’re attached to me, that’s how you’ve grown
Won’t you leave me, leave me aloneYou’re really growing on me
Or am I growing on you?
You’re really growing on me
Or am I growing on you?
Any fool can seeYou’re really growing on me
Or am I growing on you?
You’re really growing on me
Or am I growing on you?
“Well, I’m not as good in this as Katniss Everdeen is,” Sebastian started once they’d reached the archery section. He already got his hand on his favorite bow, the one he was most comfortable in using, and was already choosing an arrow from the table. “But I know how to use it enough to protect myself in the Arena.” He continued to choose an arrow, his eyes glued to the silver things. When he finally chose one, he looked up at her, his eyes immediately boring into hers as he finished his statement. “And enough to protect you too.”
He notched the arrow in its place between his fingers and the string. He raised it and trained it on the second nearest target, aiming for its heart. As he pulled the strings as far back as necessary for the hit, he said, “Of course, that is if you want to be protected by me.”
With that, he glanced at her again and then fixed his stare on the target he was aiming at only a split second after. With the familiar twanging sound of the string, he released the arrow and it came swishing towards the heart of the target dummy. It didn’t hit the very middle of the circle, but nonetheless, it hit the place where a human’s heart would have been if the target dummy had one.
“So, would you trust me enough to let me watch your back in the Arena?” He asked her with a raised eyebrow. And then he smiled at her, a real genuine smile. “‘Cause I know I am.”
Sebastian, then, outstretched the bow towards Miranda. “Do you wanna learn how to use this?” For the kind of game they were preparing for, learning everything you could with the little time given to you would be the wisest thing to do. Learning should be a tribute’s best friend. And now that Sebastian could help in that learning process that Miranda would go through, he wanted to. It wasn’t always that he got to help someone learn something because it wasn’t always that he already knew what they were trying to learn. Usually, he learned with them. But this time, he could help her learn. The only answer and approval he was waiting for was hers. “We need to know how to use as much weapons as we could. It’d help us greatly in that pit of hell we’re entering soon.” He offered her another smile, an encouraging smile. He hoped his desperation in hearing her yes wasn’t that much obvious in his voice.
Miranda knitted her eyebrows together and watched Seb patiently as she tried to gauge his skill with the bow. She knew next to nothing about archery, seeing as everything she killed back in District 10 was close range, but she was deeply interested in Seb’s talent. Even more so because he wanted to be her ally and she was pleased that he was even considering a partnership. “Enough to protect me? Interesting.” As if she needed protection. She was older than him, could kill close range, and from the looks of it, would be the one with less value for human life.
“I don’t need to be protected, I need a killer.” It was harsh and blunt and sounded far more emotionless and cold than she had meant it but it was true so she didn’t bother to rephrase the statement. Seb still struck Miranda as kind of creepy but from her experiences in life, it was the creepier ones who were the best killers. She’d like to believe Seb could be a killer but oddly enough he reminded her of their mentor, Robbie, and in her eyes that wasn’t really a good person to remind her of. She could only hope that Seb would be more pleasing to her taste than Robbie.
Her hazel eyes followed the arrow as it shot forward, and she smiled as she was pleased with the result. Miranda still found Seb to be rather creepy and she didn’t trust him in the slightest but it was best to ally with your district partner and she would need allies sooner or later, and one that could match her close range skill with a long range one would work in her favor. “But very well, Seb. I’ll watch your back too.” She said, somehow managing to smile, and one that didn’t seem faked. She was happy to have an ally but she still remained wary. Perhaps Seb saw it differently, or was leading her to believe it, but Miranda just couldn’t put her faith in anyone but herself while a tribute.
“Do you wanna learn how to use this?” […] “We need to know how to use as much weapons as we could. It’d help us greatly in that pit of hell we’re entering soon.”
With a deep sigh she carefully took the bow extended to her. “You’re a weird guy, you know that?” Honestly, had Seb been from any other District, Miranda would have just written him off completely and not bothered with him unless she was face to face with him in the Arena. “But sure, I’ll give it a shot.” Robbie had said to try learning new things, even though she found the advice pointless. She would learn archery to please everyone else. She took an arrow as well and attempted to hold the two objects correctly, not even bothering to aim, not right away. “Is this correct?” She had tried to hold the bow the way she had seen Seb do it but she was fairly certain she wasn’t.
